Do What You Gotta Do to be YOU

by Paul Grace-Neal

Oxon Hill, MD–Today, God confirmed through my pastors what I was struggling with. Sometimes you’ve got to let things and people near and dear to you go. Jobs, friends, and even family can be destructive to who you are and where you need to go. They become distractions and even road blocks deterring you from your goals and even purpose.  

In these moments think about what’s most important and vital to your life. Just like you take out the garbage if things are no longer needed or are beyond use, you also need to clean up your own life of places, things, and people. Place yourself in positive environments, around positive people, and do positive things in life. If someone leads you to regress, move forward and leave them behind.

As an openly identified Trans* man, I had to learn this the hard way. People thought I was a freak, something to experiment with, and a confused and confounded mess. How can you call yourself a man? You don’t look like a man. But I took it “like a man”. I allowed them to break me and tear me down. But unfortunately, I was the only one who was impacted by their rhetoric. They dumped thier issues upon me and went on their way, not knowing or caring how hurt I had become. Yet I forced myself upon them for acceptance,and approval. I thought that I had done something wrong to them, family and friends alike. But when I thought about what I did to them, I couldn’t recollect ANYthing.  

In my discovery, I realized it wasn’t me. It was their own stuff. As I let go, I was assured that although it wasn’t easy it was nessesary. I had to do what I had to do for me. It doesn’t matter if people understand or even accept me in these situations. It doesn’t matter whether they thought it is right or wrong for me to be Trans*. What mattered was for them to respect me. Without respect, we have nothing and are nothing.

Don’t let anyone break down your Spirit, emotions, body, or soul. Don’t let anyone try to tell you that you are nothing. We are all greater than SOMEthing. We are unique, special, and meant to be alive. We are meant to live life to the fullest. If you can only live life partially–half way, let whatever is weighing you down go. As your struggles diminish, you will feel lighter and be more focused and able to fulfill your goals that lead to your final destiny.

Be encouraged and loved.


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